Great news: Happiness is a Skill!

The founding of Positive Psychology 20 years ago (give or take, 1998) produced copious amounts of new scientific knowledge about what enables individuals to thrive.

Positive Psychology is no other than a deep, multidisciplinary dive into “what goes well” in life. And  according to its founder, Martin Seligman, “the goal of positive psychology in well-being theory is to measure and to build human flourishing”[1].

There is general consensus that happiness is a construct, which means we make it.  It has a lot more to do with our perception of our circumstances than the “reality” of them. Our perception is an interpretation of our reality, filtered by our deepest (often unrevised) beliefs, the traps of our ego, the “traps” of our brain.

According to Seligman, well-being has five measurable elements that contribute to it, and are referred to with the acronym PERMA. They are:

Positive emotion (happiness and life satisfaction)
Engagement
Relationships
Meaning
Accomplishment

Positive Psychology is offering us invaluable information. Like the ideal ratio positive:negative emotion (Barbara Fredickson) or the isolation of 24 universal character strengths that can be improved by deliberate practice (check out the VIA Character Institute!), as well as very specific actions we can take to improve our lives. We now have the whys and the hows of our own thriving on hand!

If happiness is an “exercisable” skill, then we can learn it, develop it and pass it on from generation to generation. The mere existence of this knowledge obliges us to modify our teaching and parenting to ensure that the people in our care will be able to enjoy real success. 

I am convinced that educators who devote time and effort to their own personal growth and happiness are better teachers and parents than those who don’t. And I don’t mean “better” in a judgmental tone. I mean more effective in ensuring that their children, and possibly everybody around them, can also acquire the skills necessary for their own well-being and success[2].

Why? Because when someone works deliberately to become the person they want to be and live the life they want to be in, they inevitably enable others to do the same for themselves. We start seeing differently, acting differently, feeling differently.

21^st century skills[3] have less to do with mastering the use of technology and more with being the masters of our own selves[4]. In order to succeed in a rapidly changing world, the awareness and skills necessary to ensure our own well-being are crucial.

Do we know what gives meaning to our lives? When are we most engaged? What turns us on? How can we increase our emotional intelligence? What is our individual and unique purpose? What are our strongest character strengths? Are they being well used so that we accomplish our goals? Are we practicing mindfulness? And interspersed in those questions, we should be wondering about the big ones too! What is life for? What is most important to me? What constitutes success? What is the purpose of schools?

I notice (and celebrate) a “collective” shift of consciousness. More of us are doing more to improve the relationship with ourselves and raise our self-awareness. We can attribute this shift solely to the existence of the internet and the rapid spreading –often viralisation- of new content that resonates with people. However, I think that there are grounds to believe that evolution plays an important part in this, but that’s beside the point.

21^st century skills require that we are more self-aware. Working in teams repeatedly, does not guarantee that we become better at collaborating. We can be creative even when we are not artsy. How can we possibly be critical thinkers, if we are not aware of how our brains work? Can we detect the traps of the ego when communication and collaboration are required? Can we be critical without being judgemental?

So this newish science is giving us a framework to success

The more in touch we are with our authentic selves (that place within each of us that is pure and unconditional love) the less the ego gets in the way of our ultimate goal of happiness for ourselves and others.

Kindness takes over. Compassion and forgiveness start to become a habit of mind and heart. Failure dissolves, as it is accepted as part of every process. With the extinction of failure and the assumption of our guaranteed imperfection, we become more daring, and thus more creative.  

While I believe that Positive Psychology is a gain for humanity in general, there is no doubt in my mind that educators need to jump at any and every opportunity to deepen their knowledge of it. More importantly: apply the knowledge to themselves and create learning environments that advance it in their classrooms and homes.

In her book Intelligent Virtue, Julia Annas writes: “Education for well-being involves preparing children for a life of autonomous, whole-hearted and successful engagement in worthwhile activities and relationships.”[5]

Who doesn’t want that?

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I dedicate this brief article to Gordana Coric, who pushed me to produce a written follow-up for content discussed in our IMPACT teaching sessions!

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[1] Seligman, M. E. P. (2012). Flourish: A visionary new understanding of happiness and well-being. New York: Atria.

[2] I understand success as being who you want to be in the life you want to live. It requires that we think and act in alignment with our authentic selves.

[3] Also known as the 4 Cs: Collaboration, Creativity, Communication and Critical thinking

[4] I go deeper into this notion in an 11-minute TED talk I did in Zagreb in May 2017. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H1LLlWUYSMc

[5] Annas, Julia (2011) Intelligent Virtue. Oxford: Oxford University Press.

SOULFUL Teaching in a Nutshell

• Soulful teaching is teaching that aspires to be in total alignment with an educator’s authentic self;
• Soulful teaching demands self-awareness and the cultivation of empathy and compassion; 
• Human relationships are at the heart of the soulful practice;
• Soulful teaching understands achievement as one element of wellbeing, i.e.: if academic goals don't provide an opportunity for growth, either the goal or the way we propose to achieve it must change. 
• Soulful teaching is a humble aspiration to be the best version of ourselves we can possibly be at each moment while modeling that for our young ones;
• Soulful teaching is a vision that we try to realize on a daily basis, understanding that the aim is the process itself and that the difficulties are what make us better. 
• Soulful teaching is more of a manifesto than a method!

Soulful teachers...

... strive to be the change they want to see in the world
... show up for their beliefs
... have a calling
... are champions of each of their students
... understand teaching as leadership
... are enablers of their students’ potential
... assess without judging
... are lifelong learners
... smile and laugh often
... establish boundaries
... are excited to release control and flow with the process.
... are present
... are models of the human condition
... are vulnerable
... listen more than they talk
... love appreciative inquiry
... are curious
... take risks
... collaborate
... embrace "the gifts of imperfection"
... see mistakes as part of the learning process
... cultivate their sense of humor
... are grateful for the privilege of their meaningful job
... inspire, empower and enable.
... live balanced lives
... are team players
... are self-aware
... are passionate
... celebrate, commend and recommend
... know their purpose
... create communities
... make a better world, one day at a time
... are storytellers
... are vulnerable
... are kind
... are great role models
... are humble leaders
... love at all times
... are in constant transformation
... ask big questions