I is for Internet (or lack of)

I is for Internet, and certainly for "irony", as I am posting this from a long-distance* bus that has free wi-fi available. So I have internet to blog on the road, somewhere between Sibenik and Zagreb, but I did not have internet to work from a hotel room in Beijing. Or Shanghai. Or Shenzhen, just name it.

And then, to be fair, I have to remind myself that we actually did have internet. Pretty much everywhere. Irrelevant internet, but internet indeed.

Our tour happened to coincide in time and place with one of the Party's parties. I forget what they call it. Basically, the delegates of all provinces of the People's Republic of China gather to make decisions about the future of their country. They pick presidential candidates and make policy. I cannot imagine something more boring. It is quite likely that there is more heated argument and debate in any meeting of cardinals at the Vatican, than can happen at one of these conventions.

So what any normal being would consider "relevant" internet is shut down to all of us inhabiting Chinese soil. Now matter how temporarily. What's the use of a computer, tablet or smartphone without Google, Google maps, Wikipedia, foreign newspapers, Facebook, Blogs or access to all Pana Wakke email and even our own website?

The truth is that the Chinese government don't give two hoots about what people like Robin or myself do on social media, or what papers we read, or even what we blog about. They are obviously well aware of the existence of VPNs**, which in very lay terms is software you install on your computer (before getting to China)  to fool "the internet" by faking your location.

This time they turned the main switch off. On everything. Stricter and for longer than I can remember. It was incredibly frustrating, and affected my work and my mood. Big time.

But now I note that the very best device installed on human beings is the inability to recreate frustration, regardless of how badly you felt it at the time of the events that provoked it. Or at least, I have that software installed in its most upgraded version.

I am trying to remember my grievances with China, how mad I was, how incommunicado I felt...and it's just not happening.

All I can remember is that I had friends who welcomed me in their fancy VPNed offices, lent me passwords to the stuff that did work, or poured a glass of wine to accompany me in the rants. My sister opened a temporary email account and set my main email to forward automatically to the new one. Clients were patient and I read more in the evenings.

While I write from my reclined seat, on a bus whose driver is not trying to get us killed, with great music playing on my noise-reduction headphones...I am satisfied. And generally happy.

My VPN troubles are behind and I can post a silly Facebook status complaining that my bus has wifi but what I really want is to pee, and there is no toilet.

We just cannot have it all.

* Note that distances are not quite long in Croatia.
**Virtual Private Network

To learn how Robin felt about connectivity, check her blog! http://startingfromzed.blogspot.hr/